I survived, barely.

I'm not quite sure how I did it, but somehow I survived the Saturday chaos of Abbie's birthday party.  As the day wore on, I wore out, but the energy of 18 girls, some with imaginations, some with little interest in anything other than being entertained was a sight to behold.  I don't know if the party could be called a success or not, but I'm glad that it is over.  Abbie made out like a bandit, partly from my own negligence in forgetting to say "no gifts" on the invitations.  She loved it though.

How does one get to this point of acquiescing to throw a party for this many girls?  I don't know.  The things we do for those we love.

Now if I can avoid having that many boys for Nigel, I will be very happy.  He is now interested in having a party of his own.  I think one every 5 years is plenty, at least for this mommy!!!

Do you ever feel like this???

Do you ever feel like you are barely keeping your head above water?  I do.  This week especially, I feel like the pig, with the snout just skimming the surface of the water.

With all the crazy things going on at work and the crazy schedule at home, I've managed to maintain my water treading ability, but I worry that the birthday party will cause me to sink. 

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm excited about the party and how happy that Abbie will be.  I'm just not too sure how I'll do it all.

So, this picture is to remind you and me that regardless of what life is throwing at you, or what you've signed up for, just keep swimming!!!

My new reading fascination

I have read an amazing book by Diana Gabaldon and am hooked on her series called Outlander.

Such a yummy read!  Now, those of you who know me well, know that I am a voracious reader.  I have tried to find the next book in the series in a number of places and just can't seem to catch a break.  I was getting really frustrated and ended up at Amazon.com to order Dragonfly in Amber, the second book in the series.  Today I finaly (after what seemed like forever) the UPS man brought me my next installment of time travel in Scotland.  Don't let that very poor description cause you to bypass these books!  I devoured the first one in a week and loved it.  Now for my next guilty pleasure!!

Hmm, I wonder why one image is larger than the other when I sized them the same???  Sometimes I don't get this Blogger bit.  I've always had an affinity for Scotland, so my heritage must be showing.  This is just whetting my appetite for more of the Highland images.  Perhaps I'll go there someday.  That is my dream vacation.  Forget sandy beaches and warm tropical breezes.  Give me the heather and wind rippling off the loch and I'll be happy!

Sometimes it shocks me....

I tried to upload this post yesterday, but Blogger wouldn't cooperate....

I'm a MOM!  Yesterday was Abbie's ninth birthday, and it took me back to the day she was born and the amazing event that it was.  I don't have any digital pictures of that time, because I didn't have a digital camera then, but here is my darling girl now:

I can't believe how fast the time has gone.  Wasn't it just yesterday that I held her in my arms? We are so lucky that she is part of our family.  She brings us such joy!  Now if I can only survive the birthday party with 20 girls!  (I guess I'm hoping that some don't show up!!)

Happy Birthday Abbie!!!

Out of the dregs of sorrow comes.....my children!

These two little darlings can get anyone out of the doldrums.  I started scrapping Sunday night, after my post, and this made me feel a whole lot better about life.  Here are two beings that are straight from our Heavenly Father, vibrant and full of hope.  Although there are days when I get frustrated with the breakdowns at Wal-Mart (tonight) it always seems that they can turn my frown upside down!  (Primary songs are always appropriate ways to express feelings!)

Here are a couple of pages I've been doing.  As always, I suck at credits, so be assured that I used a digital template and kits, not of my own creation, but of someone much more computer savvy than I am!!!

Abbie at her piano recital on December 18, 2008 at the Layton Library Auditorium.  She played really well!

A couple of Christmas pics of gifts.  Look at Nigel cheesing it up with his Red Robot.  He calls him "Red Clawson"!

Of course the traditional Christmas Jammies!  What family doesn't do this, I wonder.  Oh, that's right, mine didn't when I was growing up...so why do I do it now?  Beats me! :)

Abbie and her games.  She is a game fanatic!

I have more photos to scrap, but this is what I had done.  I'm just so lucky to have kids like this, who are so good.  I certainly do love them!!!

A trip down amnesia lane....

What an interesting day.  I have taken a trip down amnesia lane, and delved into the depths of the hideous time known as high school.  For all that I can speculate, I can't come up with the reason for why the short three or four years spent in a concrete edifice would shape ones life to such an extent.  I don't remember some of the names and faces of those who were friends and  I don't remember some of the moments that supposedly shaped my life.  On the other hand, while joining Facebook has helped me reconnect with some of those that I have truly missed, there are others that I really don't mind if I connect with again.

I found out today that my high school Newspaper advisor passed away a couple of years ago.  I just haven't kept in touch with anyone from those days, so I never found out the sad news.  It really made me feel like there are some parts of those days that I treasure and kick myself for not keeping in touch with those people who meant a lot to me.  

My good friend Shelly told me that I have to go to my 20 year high school reunion so that we can see how so many of these people have turned out.  At least if I go with her, I will have someone to talk to.  Her husband and I graduated the same time, and she graduated a year after.  It was only after moving into the same ward after having kids, that we became friends.

I just don't see the attraction, but it is like a train wreck.  I can't stop looking and reliving some of the things that were part of my life at that time.  But, there are things that happened that shaped me into who I am today.  I often attribute many of my life altering moments to my time spent in Uruguay and not to high school.  I suppose in a way I'll have to do a bit of rethinking.  I still don't know if one could get me to go to my high school reunion, but perhaps I'll get reacquainted with some of my friends and just see....

The absolute frustration

There are days when everything seems to go just fine, but overshadowing the accomplishments, hangs the storm clouds of discontent.  Today has been one of those days.

I worked like crazy today, with very little in terms of accolades or recognition.  That wouldn't bother me normally, but today it grated on my nerves.  It was as if I have been taken for granted one too many times.  While I was away, my husband and children had a lazy day, not even changing out of the jammies all day.  I don't fault them for this, but just wish I could have participated in it with them.

While reeling from this discontent, I came home and sat at my computer and started to write.  The words wouldn't come and felt like I had hit a brick wall.  I'm not talking about blog writing, but putting pen to paper for the images that were swirling in my head.  It has been a stalemate.  That particular feeling just pushed me over the edge into the dark side.  I went to bed.

So, to help myself feel like I've accomplished something for myself today, I'm blogging.  There is no rhyme or reason to my ramblings, but the comforting fact that my keyboard is clicking along and I sound productive.  My late evening nap hasn't restored my energy, so I may end up back in bed, sleeping away the night, dreaming of a new attitude tomorrow.

Eleanor Roosevelt said: "The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams."  Are my dreams enough to accomplish what I have set out to do?  Does my future really belong to me?  Am I the author of my own destiny and journey?  I suppose that those questions are not to be answered in a mere few moments of introspection, but will take a lifetime to discover.  I am impatient and expect things to be displayed exactly to my own specifications and time frame.

So, while I have had a dark day, tomorrow may be brighter.  I will go back to bed, and wake up in the morning with a new sense of purpose and will try again.  I just can't give up.  Just start to write.